I would describe myself as a recovering functioning introvert.
Socialisation and networking does not come naturally to me and is something I have had to learn over time. I apologise to my wife and the colleagues I worked with early in my career who dealt with a much different version of me :)
This video is awesome and reminds me that making connections is a learned skill and can be improved. By labelling myself as an introvert, I'd given myself an excuse to not go on that growth journey as quickly as I should have. I'd stayed in my comfort zone.
Here, Sean Stephenson shares 12 tips he learned from people who are awesome at making connections. Whilst it's never as simple as "just do what others do and get the same results", there is something to be said for identifying common patterns amongst those that are outstanding at what you want to improve on.
"History doesn't always repeat, but it does rhyme" - Tony Robbins.
Besides, these just aren't any people - There are lessons from the Bill Clinton, The Dalai Lama & Richard Branson.
The video is about an hour long and highly recommended. If you'd prefer to listen to a podcast grab it here. If you're really impatient, the tips are below - but please watch/listen as the storytelling is fantastic.
BILL CLINTON
Using peoples names (a tip from How to win friends and influence people that I've been practising for 20 years and still need to remember). My self talk of "I suck at remembering names" Just perpetuated this.
Eye contact and creating a bubble for the person you are conversing with so they have your full attention.
Ask for peoples opinions
Make physical contact through a slight touch/tap in the arm or shoulder. Bill was probably a little too good at the touchy touchy...
DALAI LAMA
Smile with your whole body
Wisdom: being in touch with intuition and willingness to share
Playfulness: Have that fun twinkle in your eye
Listen Deeply: Really be in the moment and put your life on hold to deeply listen - not just hear.
RICHARD BRANSON
Calm voice: RIchard has a measured calming tone that doesn't oscillate wildly
Creative questions: Ask curious and creative questions because not only will you learn, and people will share. You never know where that might lead.
Be humble: You can still be confident and humble
Sean's own tips on connection:
See it as a game of pingpong where there is an equal exchange and the ball gets batted back and forth. Ask yourself - has the other person had the ball 50% of the time?
Praise: It's free - spread that stuff everywhere. And do it publicly.
Be vulnerable: Be authentic, and honest in your sharing.
Hopefully you find that list useful, and please watch/listen to the talk.